I ROCK TO ORANGE BOOT
Larks! Last night I rocked to top US ghost metal shoe-gaze band ORANGE BOOT, who drove to Ramsgate of Kent in their red truck of steel!...
I READ ABOUT COW IN HEIST SHOCK
I see that some cow, enraged by the milko waiters who stalk her fields, has been arrested following a daring theft at a supermarket in...
I FIND A SEA CAPTAIN IN MY GARDEN
A sea captain of note, found in my vegetable garden yesterday, has been taken back to his fleet of wrecked vessels, given a glass of rum...
I AM BOTHERED BY FABRIC DOGS
Some days I head to a beach where people walk pets, and today I was bothered by fabric dogs. Obviously some of them were of soft wool and...
I NOTE LYME REGIS WILL HOST PARLY OF BRASS
I can report that once again, the UK's Parly of Brass has chosen Lyme Regis of Dorset as the venue for its annual conference and picnic....
I HEAR THAT QUEEN VISITS FARMER HERE
Yes. Following her successful visit to the castles of Bristol, the Queen spent yesterday with Bill Plaice of Charmouth in the county of...
I SEE DEVON PORKER WINS GLOBAL TAIL PRIZE
I see that a fabulous porker from Okehampton of Devon has won the prestigious 'Curliest Tail of the Globe' prize in a biting bacon-off at...
